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露西

Core values make me want to exit the plane. Should I?
要不要下飛機?

飛機因故障返航,我該下飛機嗎?

I am seated in an aircraft heading back to the terminal. We had been speeding down the runway when the pilot slammed on the brakes and aborted take-off. He told us a warning light had gone off and he had to contact maintenance and see what needed to be done. He then educated us on the airline』s core values, concluding with the boast that the most important is passenger safety.

我正坐在一架正掉頭返回停機坪的飛機里。方才,我們正沿著跑道加速時,飛行員突然來了個急剎,中止了起飛。他告訴我們,有一個警示燈滅了,他必須聯絡維修人員,看需要做些什麼。他緊接著就開始向我們宣揚這家航空公司的核心價值,他用自豪的口吻總結道,最重要的是旅客安全。

I am not encouraged; my years of experience with corporate values have taught me they bear little relevance to practice. Should I get off the plane?

我一點也沒有覺得受到鼓舞。以我對企業價值的多年經驗,我認為企業價值與實踐幾乎完全脫節。我應該下飛機嗎?

Finance director, male, 54

財務總監,男,54歲

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Lucy』s answer

露西的回答

As there is no way in hell that they would let you get off and as aeroplanes almost never crash, I am going to ignore your direct question. And as you wrote this two weeks ago, and as I haven』t heard anything about a finance director dying in an air crash, I』m guessing the story had a happy ending.

由於他們根本不可能放你下飛機,而且飛機幾乎永遠都不會墜毀,所以我會忽略你的直接問題。而且你是在兩周前寫的這封信,而這段時間內我也沒聽說有哪位財務總監死於空難,我猜想故事應該有了一個圓滿的結局。

Instead, I』m taking the question to be whether one should feel alarmed when companies start reciting their values. Normally, the answer is yes. A company that forces employees to tell customers that it is dedicated to creativity and life-long learning is as absurd as a person who, on meeting another for the first time, says: 「I』m Lucy. I』m honest and creative and really like other people.」 There is never any point asserting such things. The only test is in the doing.

我把你的問題理解為:當企業開始背誦所謂的企業價值時,人們應不應該感到警惕?一般情況下答案是肯定的。如果一家公司逼迫員工告訴顧客,本公司秉承創造精神、篤信終身學習,那簡直和一個人第一次和別人見面時就說:「我叫露西,為人誠實,有創造力,喜歡與人相處」一樣滑稽。這種事情自吹自擂根本沒有意義,唯一的檢驗標準在於實際表現。

Any declaration of values is made all the more dismal because the values themselves are so banal. You could say safety is not banal, but then it is not really a value at all. To be told that an airline values safety in the same breath as being told it values, say, curiosity or diversity, is the opposite of reassuring.

任何有關價值觀的宣言,都會因為那些價值觀本身乏善可陳而越發顯得沉悶。你可能會說,安全並不是乏善可陳的,但安全也根本不算是一種價值觀。剛說完一家航空公司重視安全,就說它也重視好奇心或多樣性,完全起不到讓人放心的作用。

However, there is something about this particular situation that sets it apart from most contact that occurs between employee and customer. This is because you, the hapless passenger, are being held captive for what is likely to be – if my experience is anything to go by – a frustratingly long time.

然而,你這種情況有一點與其它大多數員工向顧客吹噓廢話的情況不同。這是因為——如果我的經驗值得參考的話——你這個不幸的旅客被困在機艙里的時間很可能長得讓人抓狂。

Some of the others around you may be nervous and it is the job of the pilot to show some leadership by saying a few words. So the poor chap has no choice but to fill the cabin with soothing patter.

你周圍的一些乘客會很緊張,而說幾句話顯示領導力也是飛行員的職責所在。所以這個可憐的夥計別無選擇,只能說些安慰人的空話。

This is where the values can come in handy. You don』t mention what airline you were flying on. But if it was, say, Delta, there is enough about its values on the website to give the pilot something to talk about for many hours.

企業價值這時候就能派上用場了。你沒有提你坐的是哪家航空公司的飛機,但比方說,如果是達美航空(Delta),它們網站上羅列的那些價值觀,就足夠飛行員講上幾個小時了。

The US airline has an entire document called 「Rules of the Road」, including the insight that 「the 『how』 is just as important as the 『what』」 and the key value is 「Develop and leverage deep customer insights」.

這家美國航空公司有整整一份文件,叫做《航道規則》(Rules of the Road),裡面的高見包括:「手段」與「目的」一樣重要,公司的核心價值是「發展並深入了解客戶洞見」。

After a while you would surely find it so boringly predictable that you would have nodded off, and before you knew it the problem would have been solved and the aircraft cleared for take-off.

用不了多久,你肯定就會覺得這些話字字句句都如你預料般枯燥,於是開始打盹。你還沒醒過神來,問題可能就已經解決了,飛機也可以起飛了。

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Your advice

您的建議

They are liars

他們都是騙子

Any company that claims its most important corporate value is passenger safety is lying. If that were true, it would not fly – sitting in the terminal drinking coffee must be safer than doing

任何號稱最重要的企業價值是旅客安全的公司,都是騙子。如果那是實話,它就不該起飛,坐在航站樓里喝咖啡,肯定比在3萬英尺高空中的鋁筒子里喝咖啡安全得多。

it at 30,000ft in an aluminium tube.

工程師、出庭律師,男

Engineer and barrister, male

要一些飲料

Take the drinks

對於機組人員的話,都要打上幾個折扣再聽。希望他們會馬上給你拿一份免費的飲品。你正在返回航站樓,所以你很可能要改簽其它航班。希望你是「白金會員」,否則就只能跟背包客們混在一起碰運氣了。拖到明天,給你任何一家航空公司的任何一個航班,你都會樂意的。

Take all messages from the crew with a big pinch of salt, and hope they will soon arrive with a free drink. You are heading for the terminal, so probably will be rebooked on to another flight. I hope you are in 「Platinum Elite」, otherwise you will have to take your chances with the backpackers. By tomorrow you will be glad of any flight out, on any airline.

匿名,男

Anon, male

要重視價值

Value the values

企業價值其實就在於員工的實際表現。CEO面臨的挑戰中有一項就是,如何確保數千名員工能夠充分理解良好的企業價值並身體力行。不要僅僅因為有人在這方面犯了貽笑大方的錯誤,就對宣傳企業價值的做法大加詆毀。

Corporate values are the actual practices of employees. One of the challenges to a CEO is how to make thousands of employees live and breathe good corporate values. Do not denigrate statements of corporate values just because some people get

退休的財務總監,男,64歲

it laughably wrong.

現在就跳吧!

Retired FD, male, 64

當然要下飛機!別坐明知剛剛出過故障的飛機。沒有什麼會議比安全更重要。

Jump now

總經理,銀行家,女

Hell yes, get off the plane. Avoid flying on an aeroplane with a known history of immediate malfunction. No meeting on the other side can be that important.

同情飛行員

MD, banker, female

飛行員只是做了他該做的事。你應該同情他,因為和其它大多數場合一樣,他也是迫不得已才羅羅嗦嗦地打了一些官腔。

Pity the pilot

匿名

The pilot reacted exactly as he should. You should just feel sorry for him as he, like most everywhere, is imposed upon to spout corporate claptrap.

你是個小孩子嗎?

Anon

你要是為我工作,卻問出這種問題來,恐怕你已經失業了。你是個三歲的小孩子嗎?如果連這麼基本的決定自己都做不了主,你就不配做更重大的決定。

Are you a child?

投機商,男

If you asked a question like this and worked for me you』d be out of a job. Are you three? If you

服從指揮

can』t make such an elementary decision you have no business making larger ones.

飛行員不會用「企業價值」開飛機的。既然大家都在同一條船上,而他更了解情況,那他幹什麼我就會幹什麼。

Speculator, male

匿名,男

Follow the leader

譯者/王柯倫

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